An alien's thoughts on life and other silly things

hi. My name's Cal. I'm 16 and live in Canada. This is basically my outlet. It helps ward off depression, and other less than pleasant feelings. Follow me if you wish to do so, I hope you enjoy my outlet. If I like your blog I will most definitely follow back .

15-Year-Old African Kid Tells Madonna To Go ‘Have Sex’ with Herself

almightykushlord:

Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.

THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE

(via carry-on-my-wayward-url)

weasels-king-henry:

ashrussell:

literally my favorite thing about the ENTIRE MOVIE is thinking about this. bc. okay. there are three avengers who could easily ascend stark tower and reach tony’s apartment and three who’d have to ride along. so did hulk grab steve and tony grab clint and thor grab natasha and all just fly up there with varying degrees of grace? or did they, as a group, walk into the lobby of stark tower and push the elevator button and wait for it to open? did hulk fit? did they shuffle around because they set off the weight alarm? and like, tony and steve go up? and clint and thor? and natasha waits with hulk last because she’s starting to feel real warm toward him? or did they all go up together? silent and exhausted? hulk nodding his head to the muzak?
EVERY POSSIBILITY IS A DELIGHT.

It also amuses me greatly to consider the fact that they were all stood there in awesome poses when Loki woke up and they must have waited there, in those poses, for him to wake up

weasels-king-henry:

ashrussell:

literally my favorite thing about the ENTIRE MOVIE is thinking about this. bc. okay. there are three avengers who could easily ascend stark tower and reach tony’s apartment and three who’d have to ride along. so did hulk grab steve and tony grab clint and thor grab natasha and all just fly up there with varying degrees of grace? or did they, as a group, walk into the lobby of stark tower and push the elevator button and wait for it to open? did hulk fit? did they shuffle around because they set off the weight alarm? and like, tony and steve go up? and clint and thor? and natasha waits with hulk last because she’s starting to feel real warm toward him? or did they all go up together? silent and exhausted? hulk nodding his head to the muzak?

EVERY POSSIBILITY IS A DELIGHT.

It also amuses me greatly to consider the fact that they were all stood there in awesome poses when Loki woke up and they must have waited there, in those poses, for him to wake up

(Source: finching, via shannondgreen)

frozenmusings:

1940’s AU - KristAnna Kristoff is part of a barber shop quartet and Anna is the daughter of a wealthy business man who owns most of the buildings in town.Anna’s fiancee, Hans, is away on business for a while and during that time she decides to bring her sister out shopping to keep herself distracted. An unexpected stranger catches her eye as they walk down the street, a rather handsome a capella singer amongst the others in the quartet. He catches her staring and begins to sing to her.It would go on like this for days after, until one day she walked up to him, playfully plucked the hat from his head and ran over behind the wall of the next building.Teasing him, she refused to give it back. "M’aam, if you don’t hand that over I’m afraid I’m gonna have to ask you out on a date. Now, I don’t think you’d want that."She smiles and places the hat on her head, "where we goin’?"
Though they both understand that she’s already engaged, they fall in love. A month later Hans returns, just as the military begins to hastily recruit every able bodied young man to help in the war. He catches word of Anna’s little afair, and makes sure a service letter finds its way to Kristoff’s doorstep, telling him he is being recruited to fight.

frozenmusings:

1940’s AU - KristAnna 
Kristoff is part of a barber shop quartet and Anna is the daughter of a wealthy business man who owns most of the buildings in town.

Anna’s fiancee, Hans, is away on business for a while and during that time she decides to bring her sister out shopping to keep herself distracted. An unexpected stranger catches her eye as they walk down the street, a rather handsome a capella singer amongst the others in the quartet. He catches her staring and begins to sing to her.
It would go on like this for days after, until one day she walked up to him, playfully plucked the hat from his head and ran over behind the wall of the next building.
Teasing him, she refused to give it back. 

"M’aam, if you don’t hand that over I’m afraid I’m gonna have to ask you out on a date. Now, I don’t think you’d want that."
She smiles and places the hat on her head, "where we goin’?"

Though they both understand that she’s already engaged, they fall in love. A month later Hans returns, just as the military begins to hastily recruit every able bodied young man to help in the war. He catches word of Anna’s little afair, and makes sure a service letter finds its way to Kristoff’s doorstep, telling him he is being recruited to fight.

(via obri-ens)